The back roads to my hair stylist wind around and through a Nature Preserve. I am not late so I am appreciating the views. Directly ahead, barely a yard above the road, a hawk is flapping valiantly trying to ascend with his prey. The prey, a large gray squirrel pitches wildly back and forth trying to break free. With a final, full body twist the squirrel escapes the talons and drops onto the road. I brake and stop. The squirrel exits right to the underbrush; the hawk flies off to the left; and I proceed to my appointment straight ahead.
Well, it has been over a month since I posted: a busy time; an important month of 9/11 anniversaries, The People’s Climate March, a new Middle East war.,.. But, my mind has been stuck on a Facebook posting.
“Everything is based on the choices you make. It’s not your parents, your past relationships, your job, the economy, the weather, an argument or your age that is to blame. You and only you are responsible for every decision and every choice you make . Period.” The poster can not understand why it makes me cranky. It is a clearly true, she replies.
Today, luckily, hawk and squirrel have clarified my objections. “You and only you are responsible for every decision and every choice you make.” That is true. But no, “everything is not based on the choices you make.” In fact, very little is based on the choices you make. Everything begets everything-your parents, your genes, your relationships, your job, the economy, the weather, the geography, the time period that you live, your choices, and lady luck. Squirrel fought back hard. I have seen hawks pick up small animals; I have never previously seen one fight like this squirrel. Today, the choice to fight resulted in freedom for the squirrel but it could have easily resulted in hawk and/or squirrel as roadkill. I was driving slowly watching the fight. I was alone and there was no one else on the road so I could brake without affecting other humans. I feared the bad karma from hitting the brave warrior rodent. I love raptors so I would not punish the villain of this drama with death, if avoidable. Choice was only part of the happy ending for the squirrel.
This is life as I know it. It is liberating to know that we can always act from within our own values and heart despite what life throws at us. It is liberating because life is not fair and we have little control- freedom or roadkill.
Violets in the Grass 